Lower Your Expectations of the World

A couple of weeks ago pastor said something in a message that sort of stuck in my craw.  He said we needed to lower our expectations on our spouse, and raise our expectations of our Mighty God.  I wasn't sure how I felt about that one.  I didn't necessarily disagree, but I didn't agree either. I had to chew on it for a while. I mean, I do think that sometimes I don't depend on God enough for things.  That to me, some things seem too small to bother God with. So, I was kind of on board with the raising the expectations there. But why did I have to lower what I expected from my spouse? How was that fair?

Then it hit me.... I have to lower my expectations of my spouse for one big reason...because he's not me!  I can't expect him to think like me, or act like me, or believe like me, or want things like me, or feel like me, or see things like me, do things like me....because HE IS NOT ME! Men and women were not created to be the same. We were created to be helpmates, not the carbon copies of each other! We should compliment each other.  Pick up where the other leaves off.  Be good at things that they may not be. I can't get mad at him for not doing things the way I would.  Honestly, it just causes unnecessary strife.

Dean and I understand this concept pretty well for the most part.  You have to pick and choose your battles in any relationship, especially a marriage. There are SOOOOOO many things not worth arguing over, but so many couple do every day.  I have worked very hard to just let things go. It was a struggle for me.  Ok, here's something you may not know about me....I have control issues! LOL If you know me at all, you know I have control issues. I like doing it all myself.  I have had to learn to let Dean help me, to take over some things, and to do things his way.  It's honestly a daily struggle sometimes.  I have to CHOOSE to let go, and let him help me.  About a year after we got married, I had to have back surgery. It literally knocked me on my butt. I had no choice but to sit down and stay down, for quite a while.  It was HARD for me, no joke! God used that time to really show me how to truly depend on my sweet spouse.  I didn't have a choice. I honestly believe God designed it that way.  He used that season to teach me to let go. But not only to let go, and let Dean help me.  But to also be ok if he did it differently.  If he didn't do things in the order I would have. Or he let Abigail go to school with mismatched clothes on. Or if he didn't cook things for dinner the way I would have.  Or he let the girls eat pizza for breakfast.  I had to see that just because he didn't do things the way that I would....didn't mean it was wrong.

Here's the crazy part of all of this... this idea applies to so many other people too....my kids, my coworkers, my boss, my parents, people in general....none of them are me!!

Lower your expectations of the people around you....raise the expectations of your God....and live a more peaceful life!